My Funny Valentine

By C. Brandon Redding

Justin

    February 14.  8:24pm.  Valentine’s Day.  Looking to his watch, Justin realizes that the day is almost over.  Another Valentine’s Day down the tube… and not a moment too soon.
    He can’t remember when exactly it became his least favorite day of the year… much less when he even started to care.  The happy couples, the candy and balloons.  It was never something he’d managed to experience.  His relationship with Rob last year managed to start after the big day.  This year, it had managed to blow up before it.
Justin had come to accept the fact that he was destined to spend Valentine’s alone a couple years ago.  Maybe that’s when it all just became another day of the year.  Another day to pretend that he was happy… when in fact, nothing could be farther from the truth.  
Even Gayle had managed to get a date for the big night.  A guy in the accounting department at McCabe Industries had asked her out a couple weeks ago.  The only reason Justin knew about it, is because he’d been present as Joan Hart tried to help Gayle find something to wear.  The short leash his mother had been keeping him on of late had permitted him on this particular shopping jaunt.  Justin couldn’t begin to understand what all the fuss was about.
As he turns the television off, Justin hears his cell phone begin to vibrate on his desktop.  Making his way over to the phone, he sees Lauren’s name on the caller id.

Justin:  Sorry Lauren… (he begins, turning the phone on silence.)  Not tonight.

    As he sets the phone back on his desk, he sees his journal sitting next to it.  He barely remembered having it out earlier.    It suddenly had all come back to him however—the  complaints about the frivolousness of this entire holiday.  It had definitely been one of those days.

Justin:  God, will this day just end already.

    He looks to his journal again, before turning the light switch off.  If he can’t make the day go by any faster, he can certainly try and escape from it.
    Laying on his bed, Justin closes his eyes, and tries to picture a better place.  A better time.  He can barely remember the last time he was happy.  Other than those precious few hours with Rob recently, it had been so long.  He closes his eyes and drifts farther away from this time and place.  Justin searches for a happy place.
    He remembers a day that he was the happiest he’s probably ever been before in his life.  It was the night he first confessed how deep his feelings for Rob ran, both to himself and to Rob.  Before things became… difficult.

Rob:  What are you doing here?

Justin:  I needed to talk to you.

Rob:  My dad’s…

      Justin interrupts Rob before he allows him to finish.

Justin:  Your dad’s gone.

      Rob seems surprised.

Rob:  Were you watching me?

Justin:  I figured I shouldn’t come by while your dad was around, so I just waited for him to leave.  Do you mind if I come in?

      Rob moves aside, holding the door open for Justin.  He enters, and finds things slightly out of order across the living room.  The room smells of alcohol.  On the table, he spots a collection of empty beer cans, and looks to Rob.

Rob:  So what brings you by?

Justin:  Rusty told me that he talked to you yesterday.

Rob:  Yeah, so?

Justin:  How come you didn’t mention it to me earlier?

Rob:  I didn’t think about it.

Justin:  I see.

Rob:  Can I get you anything?

Justin:  I’m good.

Rob:  So is there anything else?

Justin:  Yeah, actually there is.  I want you to be honest with me.

Rob:  About what?

Justin:  I need to know if this is even worth my time Rob?  I mean, I like you…  it’s crazy how much I like you.

Rob:  Justin…

Justin:  I’m being serious Rob.  If you don’t like me, I need you to just tell me and I won’t bother anymore.

Rob:  That’s not it.

Justin:  What then?

      Rob turns away from Justin and makes is way to the sofa.  Justin proceeds to follow behind him.

Rob:  You wouldn’t understand.

Justin: Try me.

      Rob wants to believe in Justin, but finds it difficult.  In his life, he’s never truly had anyone that he could count on in his life.  He finds the possibility overwhelming.

Rob:  It’s just…

      Rob looks to Justin, and finds himself unable to speak.  Justin looks into his eyes, and for the first time, sees someone that he could honestly find himself falling in love with.  Justin finds his hand making it’s way to Rob’s face, and caresses his cheek.  Their lips touch, and for a moment, it’s as if nothing else matters to them.
      Justin allows his hands to make their way to Rob’s shirt.  Rob tries to pull away, but Justin pulls him closer to him.  Justin’s hands feel their way under Rob’s shirt, lifting it up.  He is horrified by the site before him.
      The dark bruises cover Rob’s entire side above his rib cage.  Justin rubs his hand across them as he gazes down to them.

Justin:  How did this happen Rob?

      Rob pulls away from Justin, pulling his shirt back down.

Rob:  Like I told your friend… I fell.

Justin:  If we’re ever going to have anything real between us Rob, we’ve got to start being honest with each other.

      Rob is silent as Justin looks to him for answers.

Justin:  Was it your dad?

      He turns away from Justin, and sees the beer cans sprawled across the table.

Rob:  It only happens when he’s been drinking.

Justin:  It shouldn’t happen at all (he says, walking up behind Rob.  He places a hand on his shoulder.)

Rob:  I used to think that it was my fault.  That I did something to make him angry.

Justin:  You haven’t done anything to deserve this.

Rob:  I wonder sometimes.  If I didn’t do things to upset him.

Justin:  Parents are entitled to get mad.  That doesn’t mean they’re entitled to hit their kids.

      Rob is silent as Justin speaks.  He knows his words to be true, but can’t bring himself to admit that Justin is right.

Rob:  I act the way that I do, because I’m sure things with my dad would only get worse if he knew I was gay.  I can’t let that happen.

      Justin wraps his arms around Rob.

Justin:  Then we’ll just have to be careful now won’t we.

Rob:  I can’t ask you to do that Justin.

Justin:  Somehow I think I can manage.

Rob: What did I do to deserve you in my life?

Justin:  I was wondering the same thing myself.

      The two kiss as they make their way back to the sofa.

Rob:  Stay the night (he whispers.)

Justin:  What about your dad?

Rob:  He won’t be back until at least tomorrow night.  I know how he is… it’ll be fine.

Justin:  I told my mom I was going over to Michael’s.  I’m sure I could convince her to let me spend the night.

Rob:  Good.

    Justin stops himself from going any further with the memory.  The night was one full of firsts.  Justin hates reliving it in memory… even more than he can bare to admit to himself.  He cries as he attempts to fall asleep.